Over the past couple of years, I've noticed that a few of my friends were finally being reunited with their parent/s. I was told that the process of petitioning an alien relative have gotten quite speedy and I was encouraged to start petitioning my mother since I've been a US citizen for sometime. This plan has always been on the back of my mind but now that I have to make that decision, I had some moments of doubt. I wanted to see first how the newly-arrived parents are managing their new lifestyle. I was curious as to how they are integrating to their new status and adjusting to a different culture. Most of them were already enjoying their retirement and had their own network of friends back home. Is it really a wise and fair decision to take all that away from them? Is living in the US really worth it for them?

Maybe I'm way over thinking these things. I'm sure people assumed that I would be trying to get my parent to come to the US once I became a citizen. I reckon people have made comments to my mother like "You're lucky. Your daughter will take you to the US". I wish it's as easy as that. My Mama had to make a very important decision to uproot herself from everything she has ever known, including leaving her own elderly mother, at this point in her life. It was certainly different for me then since I was just starting out and very eager for a fresh beginning. My mother have already made a life for herself. She is surrounded by family and friends and although far from living in utmost abundance, she has properties she can speak of. Being here in the US means she will be financially dependent on us, with less family and not much of a social life. Furthermore, she won't be able to visit my father's grave whenever she wants. She really do have a lot to give up if she's going to make this move.

Don't get me wrong. She liked it here when she and my father visited five years ago. In fact, my parents were looking forward to migrate eventually. But now that my father's gone, I wasn't all too sure if my mother would be happy in a new place where she only have me and Kenny as immediate family. As much as I would love for her to be close by me, I left the choice up to her. After mulling things over, her ruling finally came down based on who's going to gain advantage from it. Like the good mother that she is, she's ultimately doing this for my youngest sister Sande . Once my mother becomes an immigrant, she'll be eligible to petition my sister since she's still under 21 years old. She just wants my sister to have the same opportunities I have. Also, my mother was motivated by the likelihood that my other sister Emily (and her family) will finally make it to the US soon since her application for a nursing job in New York is currently in the works. Things are definitely looking more to her liking and I'm glad and relieved about that. I wouldn't want her to be left in the Philippines without my sister since she's been looking out for her. My mother might not be in poor health yet but I'd prefer for her to be in a place where there is better medical care when she needs it. I still blame my father's demise on the substandard medical service in our city. I just wouldn't want my mother to be another casualty.

A few weeks ago, I finally submitted the application to the USCIS. It took sometime to get everything together as it can be a slow and tedious process obtaining documents from the Philippines' government offices. It was a mad rush to submit the requirements since I wanted to take advantage of the lower fee. After July 31st, the application fee was raised from $190.00 to $355.00. That's quite a big difference, huh?

Anyway, I recently received the Notice of Action   that notified me of the receipt of the application. I spoke to my mother about it and she seemed pleased that things are going as planned. She sounded quite excited and informed me that she's starting to get her business in order, tying up loose ends and making sure that my little (not really so little anymore) sister will be taken cared of while she's away. It's going to be tough to be parted from each other but such sacrifice is necessary to achieve the ultimate goal of a family reunion that's been long overdue. I can't wait for that to happen soon!

This blog entry is long overdue but I hesitated to post it earlier since I wanted to wait for the right time to do it. I didn't create this blog just to rant and rave about how terrific or terrible my life is. I also aspire to share as much information and insight based on my experiences. Therefore, it is my hope that the readers will be interested, educated and motivated after reading this.

A few weeks ago, I was having some trouble with my right hand due to Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. It turned out to be not my only health concern. On top of multiple muscle aches and joint pains, I suffered an intolerable intermittent headache for more than 2 weeks. The list of health issues or symptoms seemed to be getting longer and I found myself feeling a lot older than I should be. It was like living inside a bottle that I can't get out of. In order to function at home and at work, I depended heavily on various OTC pain medications for relief. Furthermore, although I've adopted a rather lackadaisical attitude towards my continuous weight gain, I can't deny that it has begun to affect (indigestion, shortness of breath, easy fatigability and sluggishness) my overall health. After weeks of procrastination and whining, I finally decided to see my doctor . The subsequent blood tests showed that I have elevated levels of cholesterol, ESR and ANA. My doctor then advised me to modify my diet and to seek a Rheumatology consultation. Whoa! Me, with arthritis?

I should have been content and follow the doctor's orders, right? Yes, I will do as I'm told but I decided to take it up a notch and take control, be more proactive about regaining my well-being. A week ago, I embarked on a 21-days detox regimen to cleanse my body of toxins and lose weight as well. No, folks. I'm not shilling for any company or products but for those who are interested in the details, just send me a message and I'd be happy to provide more information. So far, I've lost about 10 lbs in just a week and I'm feeling so much better. My aches and pains are gone and I have so much energy to spare. I'm aiming to lose 10-15 more in the next 2 weeks and I plan to keep those pounds from creeping up again by being more aware of what I put in my body and getting rid of what's not good. They say that "you are what you eat" but it's also true that "you are what you don't excrete".

So, why am doing this? I think most of us expats can attest that after having lived here in the US (or anywhere else) for sometime and you go back to the Philippines to visit, your friends and family are apt to make observations about your apparent "chubbiness". Comments like "Tumaba ka" or "Nanambok lagi ka", although done in a teasing manner, can undeniably rankle on your nerves since you've just spent the last few weeks prior to the trip dieting and exercising but it wasn't enough anyway. Then, you gain a lot more from indulging in all the food and delicacies that you missed and haven't tasted for what seemed like forever. At the end of the trip, I can hardly zip up my jeans. Ugghhh!

Realistically, we can't expect to stay the same size we were when we first left the Philippines but living a different lifestyle in a different culture has definitely and unfavorably changed us physically and it's taking a toll on our health. How so? Let's start with our eating habits and food choices. All of a sudden, there's the abundance of foods that used to be unaffordable or inaccessible back then. The bad news is that we find ourselves ingesting more processed and chemically altered foods than ever before. For instance, going out for a pizza might have been a rare thing to do in the past. Nowadays, you only have to open your freezer and have a slice (or more) of cheesy pizza in a few minutes. In fact, almost everything you eat might be frozen or packaged . There's also a variety of soda and flavored drinks on hand to wash the food down. Your pantry might be looking like a mini "sari-sari" store containing canned goods, bags of chips, baked goods, packages of noodles and pastas, condiments, etc. If you check the contents on the labels of these stuff, it's like reading a chemistry project and you'd be amazed at how much calories and salt you're getting from such a small amount of food . When you go out for a meal, the servings are so huge that you can easily feed a family of 3 to 5. By the time you're done with your soup, salad and appetizer, there won't be enough room for the entree although a dessert might be hard to resist. Sooner or later, eating larger portions become the norm and expectation. This is indeed a country who loves to supersize.

The other factor is our lifestyle. Although we work hard in our respective professions or jobs, most of us are living in a sedentary pace. We don't have to walk anymore to the nearest bus or jeepney stop as we most likely have our own mode of transportation which is a necessity if public transit is not available. The most walking we'll probably have would be at the mall as we indulge in retail therapy, a favorite pastime among Americans. Another issue is the higher stress level that we are subjecting ourselves to. In keeping up with a fast paced world, we are exhausted all the time and we barely give our bodies enough time to rest and recuperate from the ravages of the day's gruelling schedule. Sooner or later, something's going to give.

Some of you might be already living and following a very active and healthy lifestyle. Kudos to you. But for some of us who are struggling to stay fit in this new environment, we have to increase our awareness of the ways to prevent ill-health and to fight the battle of the bulge. As we know, obesity is a prevalent problem in the US. By the time a person turns 50, he or she might already have a long list of diagnoses and surgical procedures in their medical record . I don't want to be a part of that statistic so I'm doing what I can to keep that from happening and you should too. We work so hard to get to where we're at and it would be a darn shame to lose everything because we are not treating our body with more care and respect. As what my sage grandma used to say, "Health is wealth" and she lived beyond her 80s. I can only hope to survive and enjoy my golden years like her.

 I realize it's been a while since my last post. I suppose I've been preoccupied with a lot of things and my focus had been split into different directions. Also, as the weather gets warmer and nicer, I find myself spending less time on the internet except when checking out my friends' blogs and updates. Yup! It's time to come out of hibernation and put on those flip-flops or Havaianas (pronounced ah-vai-YAH-nas), shorts, capris and summer dresses. Although it can still get cooler and the temperature usually takes a dip at night, I can already tell the big difference in my mood. Somehow, optimism comes easier and my reservoir of patience and tolerance is being replenished as the mercury rises.

 There's definitely an attitude makeover in progress. Even the fact that a few more pounds had crept up on my my already "pear-shaped"  physique, I don't mind it as much as I used to. Perhaps working in an environment where people gets a rude awakening on a regular basis helps anchor my perspective on the harsh realities of life. A few nights ago, I came upon a forty-something female patient who was sobbing on her bed. When I asked her what's wrong, she tearfully replied,"The food just goes through me. Nothing is being absorbed. How can I put on any weight at all?" In case you don't understand what she meant, she was referring to the chronic diarrhea that she's suffering from for almost two months now. Her shrinking body can testify to what she's been going through. She was very frail and cachectic looking and could be easily mistaken for a gangly twelve year-old girl with her very tiny frame. I was at a loss for words. I muttered a few words of sympathy and comfort and left the room minutes later feeling humbled and grateful that my body is still capable of nourishing itself and I get to go home and enjoy doing the things I can do.  There's just so much to be grateful for indeed. Let me count the blessings.

A tested formula: a happy Rosemarie = a happy Kenny . When he found out that it's going to be in the 80s last Sunday, he proposed to take a drive to downtown Chicago and take the dogs, Sidney and Lara, for a stroll down Lake Shore Drive. I happily agreed and was so psyched for it that I didn't even mind having only 2 hours of sleep before heading out. There was a spring in my step that I just couldn't mask and I couldn't help laughing at every cute little thing that my doggies did. They were as excited as their Mama Monkey (that's me    and Papa Monkey (guess who?). We trekked from the Adler Planetarium all the way to the Navy Pier which probably spanned more than 3 miles. Our feet (and paws) were feeling the burn but we prodded on, taking the time to appreciate the beautiful scenery and the relaxed vibe from the people around us.  Our downtown excursion was an easy reminder that the simple pleasures in life don't have to come from expensive objects or grand events. It's just out there, mostly for free ( except for the parking fee, I guess) and more satisfying than anything. We had such an awesome time that Kenny offered to do it again on Saturday and his Mom will probably come with us as well. I am so looking forward to it already.

I hope I didn't bore you guys . I just feel like sharing since I know most of you are also having great times together with your friends, families and loved ones. In light of the tragedy that recently struck Virginia Tech, a little love fest and feel-good moment couldn't hurt, right? Anyhoo, let me end this rambling with this quotation:

"Determine now to not make your life's end a moment filled with regrets. Or at least make sure they are the right regrets. Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can."

Paint away, folks!

 As our house is back on the market again for the second time, we've had a few occasional viewing mostly on weekends which is particularly rough on Kenny since he prefers to sleep in on his days off but has to wake up earlier so we can get the house ready and vacate it before the realtors and their clients arrive. We try not to be present when potential buyers are scrutinizing our home as we realized it could be an awkward situation for everybody. We once viewed somebody's residence last year and came upon the homeowner still eating lunch with his shirt off despite being notified ahead of time.  We also marvel at how people can allow strangers to see so much clutter in their abode. Although it can get wearisome at times, we try to keep our dwelling in tiptop shape and decorated it very minimally, not kitschy. A few of the houses we've looked up so far have so much tschotschkes in every nook and cranny that it can somehow detract from the potential of the house. Let's not even mention some of the most dated or hideous decor we've ever encountered. I know we have different tastes and sense of style (nothing wrong with that) but I guess we've seen enough TV shows on TLC or HGTV to know the importance of first impressions when it comes to selling real estate. At least we think so.

Last Tuesday, Kenny told me that we had a viewing while I was sleeping . He apparently received an urgent call from our realtor about a request to show the house that night. He agreed on the condition that the master bedroom will be an exception. He didn't want to wake me up since I have to work that night . He rushed home from work to tidy up and while he was still straightening the basement, he heard voices speaking a foreign language. He came up to the first floor to find three Filipinas with their realtor (a Filipino). Despite being caught by surprise, Kenny managed to welcome them and reminded the realtor that the master bedroom was off limits for the time being. They seemed to have no problem with that and went around inspecting the house.

Kenny thought they appeared to be really interested on the number of bedrooms and were focused on how they can potentially add another bedroom in the basement . He suspects they might be a bunch of friends or relatives who'd be sharing in the purchase. They expressed their compliments over the paint color choices on the walls and seemed wowed by the decorating style and layout. Overall, the comments were positive and encouraging but we've heard them many times before when we first placed the house on the market last August. We still haven't received a reasonable offer so we try not to get too excited anymore. We've been down this road before and we are aware that it's a "buyer's market" out there right now.

 I  do love our house as it's our first one and we've put so much work on it to suit our needs and sense of style. We've shelled out considerable amount of money on some pricey upgrades so we were fairly confident that it will get sold quickly when we first placed it on the market. Alas! The real estate market deteriorated right around that time and with winter came even less chance of people being interested in purchasing and moving. Our one attempt at an open house was unsuccessful so we're not considering it again.  We also had our share of no-shows which was certainly annoying. Now that it's spring, we are hoping that we'll be able to beat the odds. Otherwise, we'll have to consider selling the house on our own, without using a realtor, which can be difficult and inconvenient to say the least.  

Allthough buying a house was nerve-wracking the first time around, it was easier and more enjoyable than selling one. When Kenny and I get into a bellyaching session on how exasperating it is becoming, I can't help but ruminate about how it wouldn't be a huge problem for me back in the Philippines if I need or want a place of my own. Modesty aside, my family have inherited substantial land and property and as long as I don't mind living in a rural area, I can have a picking of a plot of land to build a house on, with a big backyard to boot.  It might not be a grand mansion complete with all the high technology gadgets but it would be all mine. I wouldn't have to go through a credit check, save for a down payment, apply for financing and anxiously wait for approval. I also would not have the monthly mortgage payments we're paying right now. Even if we get our house sold eventually, we are faced with the possibility of buying a substandard property (and still expensive) for the sake of location.  

The one thing I learned from our home buying and selling process is the first rule of real estate: "location, location, location".  When I first came to the US, I was amazed at how much emphasis is placed on the location of one's residence. Safe and affluent neighborhoods with commendable school systems are just some of the factors that make an area with high property resale values. In order to get into one of these sought after locales, one might end up biting too much house. That is, a too-big house payment which can, at the very least, leave you with too little money for other goals: retirement, vacations, college funds for the kids. At worst, it can leave you vulnerable to foreclosure and bankruptcy.  We certainly don't want that.

Years ago, I never would have thought I'll be dealing with matters like real estate, taxes, financing, mortgages, etc. I usually wouldn't pay any attention to any subject using jargons that my brain finds too intricate to fathom. For me, those kind of stuff are for my parents to handle . I guess I have to accept the fact that I'm clearly an adult now and have to make an effort in comprehending all these business and financial verbiage  . With the help of the internet and a lot of research, Kenny and I have been able to wade through all the information and weed out the faulty ones. We just hope that we are better armed to make an intelligent decision once we find ourselves in the homebuying market again.  

Will somebody please buy our house already!

The last time I spoke with my mother, she relayed to me that my Aunt Agnes will be running for office again. She is currently a City Councilor and seriously considered to join the race for the Vice Mayor position for the upcoming election in May if no one from her party stepped up.  Fortunately, she didn't have to so I breathed a sigh of relief. My mother voiced her concern that the candidate from the opposition is quite formidable and have a murky reputation of intimidating and eliminating other candidates through allegedly unsavory tactics. As much as I have conviction in my aunt on her leadership aptitude and bona fide political passion, I wouldn't want her life endangered. In light of the pervasive corruption in the country, I remember a popular saying pertaining to the Filipinos' campaigning style. It is said that if you want to win, you must have the 3 Gs: Gold, Guns, and Goons. Now, I'm not saying that I condone or espouse this kind of thinking. Sadly, this is the monstrous reality that rears its ugly head come election time.

I didn't have a lot of opportunities to vote back then but I'm quite familiar with the campaign trail shenanigans since some members of my clan (including my father) had some political affinity coursing in their blood. My grandfather was a City Mayor ages ago and consequently, some relatives vied for various positions throughout the years, sort of carrying on the family tradition. A few were successful but most of them gave up any endeavors altogether upon recognizing that they just don't have enough means (mainly financially) to change the rules and bargain on an impartial and scrupulous outcome.

Just when I thought that the family have finally put aside any political ambitions to rest, my aunt decided to throw her hat in the ring . If you know her personally, you can just appreciate the amount of moxie and intestinal fortitude this woman have. With no political experience under her belt to speak of, one might say that she naively stepped into the political arena like a lamb at the mercy of power hungry lions. Granted she has the financial resources to support the campaign costs, it is her herculean ability to see the big picture and the stalwart belief that she can make a difference that got her through the rigorous and sometimes treacherous campaign process. She obviously had her share of muckraking and mudslinging but it didn't deter her from her staying on course and gaining the respect of her constituents. I was indeed proud and pleased when she got elected and served her term with remarkable aplomb and accomplishment. Therefore, I absolutely support her in her bid for another term to serve the people who put their trust on her. Heaven knows we need more people like her in the Philippines.

As America is also in the midst of gearing up for the next presidential election, I can't help but notice and compare the compatibilities and disparities of their campaign practices to that in the Philippines. I don't pretend to fully understand the mechanism or machinery so I can only base my opinions on what I observe in the media and on conversations with other Americans. I will not go into details here but what they definitely have in common are the omnipresent controversies and smear propaganda which can get ugly and personal. It's like a piranha feeding season just like the last time. When we were in Italy last year, we saw and heard the same scenario as well. I guess it's a universal thing. Different people with different languages but with similar actions and motivations. 

Whatever the upshot is for every election, I just hope that it will bring the citizens and voters what they hope to achieve from exercising their suffrage and egalitarianism. Let me close this soliloquy of mine by quoting Napoleon Dynamite's friend Pedro,"Vote for me, and all your wildest dreams will come true." 

As I've posted before, there's another wedding   coming up in Kenny's family and it is fast approaching as evidenced by the invitation I received for a bridal (or rather, couple) shower last Friday night. With only barely three hours of sleep, I head over to the banquet hall where the groom's mother hosted the affair. As expected, the attendees (more or less 50) were prodominantly women but the groom and the bride's father were also in attendance. I was relieved to find that my mother-in-law reserved a seat for me next to her and my sister-in-law. After extending a round of greetings and hugs to the rest of the family, I settled down to enjoy the nice dinner deftly served by the staff.

After the desserts finally disappeared from the table, Sarah and T.K. started opening numerous boxes and giftbags from the long table across the room."Ohhhs" and "ahhhs" occasionally emanated from the crowd. Most of the presents were houseware and kitchenware items and some miscellaneous home decorative accessories. Some also included stuff that the couple might find useful for their honeymoon in Las Vegas (casino chips, sunscreen, etc). There were also envelopes that contained either giftcards or checks. Sarah and T.K. made a point of acknowledging and thanking the givers and were obviously overwhelmed by their generousity. Overall, it was a very successful event. The young couple will certainly find themselves running out of space in their townhome due to the multitude of gifts they have received so far. I found out the the bride's family will also be hosting another shower soon. Lucky kids, huh?

I felt the same way when Kenny and I had our own pre-wedding festivities a few years ago. In fact, we had a total of three bridal showers. Aside from the first one hosted by Kenny's family and the second one that was separately given by my close friends, my coworkers at the hospital surprised me with a breakfast party where they presented me with a huge basket full of miscellaneous items that they chose from our registry. Ah, the bridal registry! What a boon it is.

When I first came to the US, I didn't know much about bridal showers. Although Filipinos have adopted a lot of Western customs (Halloween, Easter bunny and eggs) nowadays, I doubt if giving a bride a gift giving party before her wedding is one of them (as far as I know). At the weddings I'd been to before in the Philippines, I remember that newlyweds mostly received houseware gifts on their wedding day. It is a great thing except the couple might end up receiving multiple sets of drinking glasses, plates, utensils and an inordinate number of thermoses, pots and pans. Since most items can't be returned or exchanged at the stores, that could pose a bit of a problem. This is where a wedding or bridal registry would have helped.

There are many benefits for a couple creating a wedding registry. First, most wedding guests appreciate having a list of what the couple needs. No one wants to be the one to buy the couple their fifth toaster . With electronic wedding gift registries, when a guest buys something for the couple, it is automatically removed from the list. Registering for wedding gifts also gives the new couple the ability to keep track of the items they have for their new life as a married couple. This eliminates the problem of having too many of one thing, and none of another after all of the gifts are opened.  Finally, having a wedding registry saves the couple from the embarrassment of answering questions about their needs. When a well-meaning friend or family member inquires as to what a couple wants as wedding gifts, many brides-to-be feel uncomfortable answering truthfully. The blushing bride may wonder how much the guest wants to spend, and how to offer some gift suggestions without sounding selfish or greedy. Having a bridal registry to direct the inquirer towards eliminates a potentially uncomfortable situation.

The first bridal shower I attended was for my friend Fritze. Although a few of her then-fiance's relatives brought gifts that were from her wedding registry, some of her friends had something else different in mind. As the bride-to-be pulled out sexy lingerie items and some unmentionables from the giftbags, the guests subsequently hollered and shrieked. The ruckus increased when a greased up stripper in a cop outfit came out of nowhere and treated us to a licentious performance that made us blush and squirm in embarassment. When the guy swooped down and took off his velcroed pants in one swift motion and gave a clear view of his obvious asset, a few girls ran out of the room like they were chased by the devil. It was hilarious! 

It was probably one of the most entertaining bridal showers I've ever attended. I'm sure some of you had been to one like it. Anyway, whether it is laid-back or full of fun and games, it's great to take part in a custom like this. It gives us an opportunity to bond with other women, pay homage to our grandmothers and mothers and be reminded to aspire to become what an ideal wife/spouse is supposed to be, in this century anyway.

Last weekend had been pretty rough for me. I got into one of my dark moods again when nothing seemed to please or appease me and when I felt determined to be miserable and drag everybody (meaning Kenny) down with me as well. Maybe I can chalk it up to a bad case of PMS and get over it eventually but I know it was something else that's just lurking and threatening to overcome my fragile state of mind. I didn't want to acknowledge it but as the days rolled on, I have to confront the inevitable. It's March 28th once again.    

Today marked the fourth year since my father's untimely departure from the world of the living. The reality of his death has eased up somewhat but whenever his birthday (October 2) and death anniversary comes around, the floodgates of grief burst open and the rush of sadness runs over me, creating havoc to my emotions.  As much as I try not to make too much of a big deal about it, I can't deny that its effects has successfully permeated my existence and took a toll on my relationship with my husband. Poor guy!  He must have felt like he's walking on eggshells for the past few days and ready to be pushed off the edge at anytime. After a tumultuous confrontation, I'm finally coming to my senses and taking things in stride until this day arrived.

Today, as I was trying to upload some new songs for my radio blog, I came across one that always makes me think about my father. It's a song from Coldplay called "Fix You". The first time I listened to it while driving on my way to work, I didn't even notice the tears rolling down my face as the haunting melody and heartfelt lyrics pierced through my whole being.  I was such a mess that night, I think . I found out later that the lead vocalist of the group, Chris Martin, wrote that song for his wife, Gwyneth Paltrow, who suffered depression due to the death of her father, Bruce Paltrow in October 3, 2002.

I suppose anyone out there who have gone through a loss of a loved one and who might still be dealing with the grief can identify with what I'm going through. I just want to share the song with you all and I hope that it will bring you comfort and solace as well.

Fix You

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
when you too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what your worth

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears streaming down your face and I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face and I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

 I was at the local Filipino store again yesterday for my bi-weekly trip for some Pinoy grub (pinakbet, pork adobo and siopao). As I waited at the checkout counter, I noticed a couple of Filipinas waiting at another counter which is the branch office of the PNBRCI (Philippine National Bank Remittance Centers, Inc). After paying for my purchases, I strode over to inquire on their current fees. I used to be a regular client of their service for years but I haven't used them lately ever since I found a different way to send money speedily to my family without filling out a form, obtaining a money order (or bank check) and mailing it to the nearest branch ASAP so the money will be received in 2-3 days. Nevertheless, I do recognize the necessity of a service such as PNBRCI to facilitate remittances to our families back in the Philippines. At the risk of sounding like I'm shilling for them, this money transfer company assures that our families will not be left wondering if the financial support they're counting on will get to them safely.

Upon stepping on any foreign soil, most Filipinos will find themselves looking for services that will cater to the need to maintain contact with the families and friends they've left behind. They'll be on the lookout for reasonably priced phone carrier services or for calling cards in anticipation of their frequent international calls, fervently hoping that the usage rates will not eat up a huge chunk of their budget (goodluck on that one   . Been there, done that. During the first five years of my stay in the US, I cringed everytime I wrote out a check to pay for the dreaded phone bill. It pains me now to realize that I could have gone home twice a year for the amount I spent at that time.

I'm sure there's a lot of people out there who've been through the same experience. Despite the costs, I doubt if they ever regret the minutes spent on the phone with their lovedones. Those moments are what's keeping us motivated and inspired to make a better life on a strange land. Hearing about our family's predicament and financial dilemmas is what's keeing us appreciative of the opportunities we are blessed with despite our own quandaries and tribulations. We work harder and save whatever money we can to dispatch it back to those who need it more. That's when remittance services come in handy.

 For those unschooled in the ways of the Filipino expats, a remittance is a transfer of funds or money through a variety of methods available. I'm sure most of you have tried and tested these amenities and are using whatever works well for your purpose. Some may send money regularly or intermittently or on a dire need basis. For instance, those with elderly parents might send a monthly fixed allowance enough to cover for their upkeep and medicines. Those who are sponsoring relatives or siblings to school might have to send an extra amount from time to time aside from the usual allowance for tuition, board and lodging. Some might have to wire money only in emergency situations such as a sudden illness, hospitalization or death of a family member.  The list can go on and on. There are numerous reasons why we Filipinos find ourselves conveying financial aid. Kenny found it peculiar at first when I enlightened him of this practice. He wasn't opposed to it but he has become more understanding and supportive especially after his first visit to the Philippines and saw for himself the huge difference in our lifestyles.  He is probably more of a giver than I am, if truth be told. 

Lest I'm misunderstood, not all Filipino expats have to provide financial aid to their families. Some may only choose to do it during special occasions such as birthdays, graduations and fiestas (for an extra lechon   . Some people might never want or need to do it at all. But for those who do for whatever reasons and frequency, there are a lot more reliable means and options now to expedite the transaction compared to 10 years ago. With the increasing use and availability of the internet in the Philippines, these remittances are indeed getting there even more rapidly than anyone can say "Show me the money!". All the better to make our lovedones breath a of relief once they receive it.  So, just out of curiousity, how do you remit and why? Feel free to share in the comment section if you want.  I'm sure people would appreciate some fresh ideas or suggestions.

I recently read a fellow friendster's blog entry about Last Song Syndrome (LSS) which was pretty timely since I've been suffering from it these past two weeks. Nope, it's not a futile or terminal affliction . It's just that I often found myself humming and attempting to sing (often incorrectly) lyrics of songs that seemed out of character for me. As much as I take pride in having an ear for an eclectic variety of music, nothing seems to get me as energized for work like the pop music I have in a CD mix that I listen to while driving. One night, I started my shift repeatedly singing "Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me", prompting my coworkers to incredulously lift their eyebrows . At another night, I was singing about bringing "Sexyback" which was apparently not too credible either as I heard someone chuckled down the hallway."Hollaback Girl" almost got me in hot water as I rapped "Let me hear you say this shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S (This shit is bananas) (B-A-N-A-N-A-S) outside a patient's room. Yep, I'd better change my music selection soon or else...

Anyway, LSS might as well stands for Last Show Syndrome. I had a very restless sleep last night thinking over the recent episode of Amazing Race: All Stars wherein my best bets Rob and Amber got untimely eliminated so early on from the race after coming in first place at the pit stop three times in a row. What a blow! It didn't help that the couple might likely credit their loss of momentum to their inability to spell Philippines correctly. To recap, here's an excerpt from the CBS website:

In Sign It, Teams had to choose a pole and building supplies and carry them up a flight of stairs to Magellan's Map. Using the map as a reference, Teams needed to figure out his journey around the world began and ended in Seville. Then, they had to build a traditional local signpost listing in order the fourteen ports of call in his voyage. While the signs didn't have to point in the right direction, all the cities had to be spelled correctly.

Rivals Rob & Amber and Uchenna & Joyce began the complicated task of building the signpost with Dustin & Kandice while Teri & Ian, Oswald & Danny, and Eric & Danielle all set off on foot in search of the sailor with a compass. Apparent history buff Rob got a jump on the competition by knowing that Magellan began in Seville while Uchenna & Joyce incorrectly assumed he began in Guam since it appeared at the end of the map. However, Rob's good start took a bad turn when he misspelled Philippines on a placard by adding an extra L and omitting a P.

If it is of any consolation to them, I am a Filipino and have made that same mistake at times. Kenny admitted to having a difficulty remembering the correct spelling as well. I've also come across a lot of articles that spelled Filipino as phillipino. I have a feeling that Rob Mariano might still be reliving that scenario in his head and after last night's episode, he's probably getting comments from viewers and friends about his misstep. Not that I care so much but I hope that he won't think or feel ill towards our country just because its name is spelled kinda confusing.

The Philippines surely grabbed a bit of the spotlight last night and hopefully will prompt some people to learn more about our country and culture. It is disheartening that the Filipinos are not being as represented in the media and entertainment business like the other Asian cultures. It was indeed refreshing when one of the contestants from last season's Survivor: Cook Islands, Jenny, was a Filipino-American from Chicago. On the other hand, there was a scene in an episode ("Four Dreams") of Medium that showed a prostitute who spoke Filipino but was supposed to be in Indonesia. What gives? I was baffled and disappointed that the writers didn't even bother to be accurate about this. Perhaps they surmise that our language is way too obscure and unpopular that nobody would know the difference.  

 Who knows what other shows and movies are out there that are depicting the Filipino language and culture quite liberally and erroneously. At the movie "Jarhead", Jake Gyllenhaal's character mentioned "...studying of phillipino mail order bride catalogue" among one of the suggested techniques for the marine to use in the avoidance of boredom and loneliness (including masturbation, rereading of letters from unfaithful wives and girlfriend, cleaning rifle). Not exactly the best picture to project about Filipinas. Hearing that, I think I must have sunk in my seat in the movie theater, feeling very self-conscious. Maybe I was just being too overly sensitive but it was not a great feeling indeed.

Speaking of movies, I got a DVD copy of the movie "Sukob" during my trip to Michigan and I'm hoping to get a few of my friends together to view it. I know most of them don't get to see any original Filipino movies very often so it would be a fun thing to do. Although watching Kris Aquino's movie is not exactly a patriotic act, supporting the Filipino movie industry is. Hopefully, the movie makers in the Philippines will inject more quality and substance in their body of work so that one day, we will see one of them being nominated for an Oscar award for Best Foreign Language Film. That would just be fantastic!  

It was a long and nerve-wracking trip to Michigan last Friday night. Two hours into my drive, I must have passed more than a dozen vehicles stranded on the side of the road and on ditches. It was a brisk night of business for towing companies and a hectic shift for the cops responding to calls about vehicular accidents. The weather conditions were pretty bad but I pressed on and got to my friend's place in one piece.

It was a bit of a shock to see how much my godson Rhyss have grown this past year. He is going to be a tall boy I'm sure. It took him a while to warm up to me but by the time I left on early Sunday morning, he let me hold him for a photo together.

His birthday party was loads of fun. I got to meet more of Marlica's friends and also got reacquainted with someone from home. Maye was younger than me and she was more my sister Emily's friend back then. I remember her to be intelligent and very talented in playing the piano and organ. In fact, she regularly played the church organ during her high school years. I've always admired that in her and it was indeed a pleasure to meet her again after all these years. She has her own family now and I was privileged to meet her husband and two of her kids. We promised to keep in touch and I look forward to seeing them again soon. Maybe when they come for a visit to Chicago. Right, Maye?

The drive home was still lengthy but the weather was more conducive. I managed to amuse myself by taking some snapshots on a particular subject that I had been interested on for some time now. Some photos didn't turn out as good  and there were times when I was sorely tempted to make an impulsive exit off I-94 to seek out those tall structures I glimpsed from afar. Anyway, I was content to add a few more pictures to my slide show on water towers.

I posted a blog entry on this before but I recalled something else related to this matter so I thought I'd write about it again. These water towers reminded me of one disparity between the Philippines and a country like the US; the lack of easy access to clean potable water.

When I was young and living with my grandmother, most people in the barrio would come to her house to fetch water from her pump -operated well. Every morning, neighbors lined up outside my grandma's gate armed with their buckets, ready to collect their water supply for the day. At sundown, a similar line formed again to replenish their containers (barrels, clay pots / banga). It wasn't until I was in high school that the village people finally started having their own water supply at home. Even then, it still wasn't dependable and could run out at any given time especially during the high volume usage. I think they even had an alloted time of the day when they had water flow and certain areas or households didn't. Much like the brown out (or blackouts) situation I remembered from my childhood. That's another story anyway.

When my parents had an additional bathroom built in their house, they equipped it with a shower stall upon my request. It turned out to be a waste of money and effort since the water pressure was too weak and all it could muster to deliver were a few drips at a time or nothing at all. More than a year ago, we commissioned for a generator and container and my mother was happy to report that the water supply has been more sufficient since. Confident enough about the water availability, another shower was installed during a recent renovation just before my last visit. Yep, I was finally able to take a decent, albeit quick shower. The water was way too cold for me since I can't seem to figure out the water heater system. Oddly enough, I didn't even mind the cold shower as much after sweating it out in a sweltering climate.

Knowing how water towers work, it really made me wish that the Philippines will someday find the resources to avail themselves of this necessity. After all, water is one of the basic needs for our survival. Anyway, if your town or city has an interesting water tower or if you have seen one somewhere else, I would surely appreciate it if you can send me a picture of it so I can add it to my gallery. That would be really awesome!

Aside from the roses and card, Kenny sprung an awesome surprise to celebrate (late) Valentine's Day. He was able to secure tickets for front-row seats to the Cirque du Soleil show Delerium at the United Center Arena. I was ecstatic and grateful for such a thoughtful gesture especially since I've been curious about the Cirque du Soleil after I saw one of their impressive shows on TV a long time ago. When I last visited Las Vegas, I really wanted to see "O"  but tickets were so impossible to come by on such a short notice. I've repeatedly verbalized such hankering to Kenny and he thankfully kept it in mind.  When he found out about Delerium being slated to perform in Chicago, he dared not pass up on the chance to wow me  .

 Delerium was not like the traditional Cirque show. It is a live music concert, a multimedia/theatrical production that features remixes of existing Cirque music and reinterpretations of performances. We had a blast! The music and visuals were, at times, overwhelming to take in all at once. I was just astonished at the magnitude of production that goes into a show like this. It was indeed auspicious for us to experience entertainment of this quality and caliber. The show only plays in arenas for one or two nights at a time before moving to the next location. Kenny sure earned some cookie points on this one .

Delerium was only one of the few shows I had been privileged to view in the past few years of living here in the US. I might not have any artistic or theatrical endowment to speak of but I sure could appreciate a great performance when I see it. One of my frustrations about growing up in a rather unurbanized city in the Philippines was the lack of access to stage plays and concerts. The gigs at the Cultural Center of the Philippines (CCP)  just seemed a world away from the various local events (beauty pageants, parades, church or school-related shows) in our city. If not for those soap operas and TV variety shows such as Eat Bulaga and That's Entertainment, it would have been a very tedious and lackluster teenage years. It wasn't until I got to college when I finally saw a live concert by popular singers such as Gary Valenciano, Randy Santiago, Martin Nievera, APO Hiking Society, etc. I rarely passed up on those events and had risked being trampled in an exceedingly crowded gym just to get a glimpse of those artists. Despite of that, I still hungered for the more theatrical, artistic and classical display of talent. It would be years before I finally got my fill.

My wish was granted when I arrived in Chicago in 1994. This city might not have the same clout and popularity as Broadway in New York but it has a very wide selection of entertainment. I can't remember the first show I caught sight of but I have a few favorites that came to mind; Nutcracker, Beauty and the Beast, Lord of the Dance, Cats, Les Miserables , and Show Boat. A few concerts I had been to were of Celine Dion, The Corrs, Madonna, Live, Phil Collins and 10,000 Maniacs. There is one show though that I just can't get enough of; the  Blue Man Group. I must have seen it like, more or less, six times already. Whenever a friend or relative visited me, I almost always made it a point to treat them to a performance. When my parents came to visit us, I did the same thing. You can just imagine the look of wonder and amazement on their faces during and after the show. They had never seen anything like it in their entire life and, in my Papa's case, never will again. It might not be the greatest show on earth but it was so far removed from what my parents previously ever experienced that's related to show business. I was glad to have shared it with them.

It was back in 1989 when Lea Salonga brought international fame and recognition to the Philippines for playing the lead role of Kim in the musical Miss Saigon in London. There hasn't probably been another Filipino artist that has achieved as much acclaim as she did which is mind boggling considering the wealth of talent in the Philippines. In my opinion, she opened a lot of doors for other Filipino artists to be recognized internationally. Anyway, ever since I saw video clips of Miss Saigon and heard the poignant songs, I know it's the one show I must see. I was therefore disappointed when Ms. Salonga wasn't playing the role anymore by the time I came to the US. I eventually caught the play in Chicago and the lead actress was also a Filipina by heritage. Believe me, I was still very proud to have witnessed such gift and showmanship. 

When Lea Salonga had a concert in Chicago last year, I planned to go see it with some friends. Unfortunately, I forgot to put in an early request to be off from work so I didn't make it .  Unbelievably, I've only been to a couple of Filipino concerts (Side A and Sharon Cuneta) here. There had been a lot of great shows that I apparently missed due to misinformation. I usually learned about these concerts by word of mouth and they can be quite delayed and inaccurate at times. Anyway, I've been checking out the free newspapers at the Filipino stores so I can keep watch on any future gigs. As much as I appreciate the theater and the musicals, it would be nice to experience being regaled by our brilliant compatriots again. That, is truly entertainment.

I know this is kind of a late entry for Valentine's Day but I've read some really interesting posts from some of my blogger friends ( Marianer Joy, Mary ) that somehow prompted me to share my point of view on this.

Unless you've been living under a rock since birth, we all know that Saint Valentine's day or Valentine's Day is celebrated on February 14. It is the traditional day on which lovers express their love for each other; sending Valentine's cards or candy. It is very common to present flowers on Valentine's Day. I got pink roses and a nice card from Kenny but he wisely skipped the candies or chocolates as he's been hearing me fret about my weight gain and insecurities . Anyway, the day is most closely associated with the mutual exchange of love notes in the form of "valentines." Modern Valentine symbols include the heart-shaped outline  and the figure of the winged Cupid. I remember making those type of cards back in grade school and handing them out to friends and family members. It was very innocent and sweet, so free of angst from the pressures that romance brings. It was the time when we have not yet tasted the bitterness of unrequited love or having your affection rebuffed from the object of your admiration. And that was just in high school.  Those rose-colored glasses have long been taken off, I must say.

Since the 19th century, handwritten notes have largely given way to mass-produced greeting cards. In the United States, the marketing of Valentine's Day has tagged it as a "Hallmark holiday." A recent trend has been to refer to February 14 as Singles Awareness Day. Aside from the obvious occasion, the day can mean so many things to people. Well, it so happens that it also marks the day that Kenny proposed to me five years ago.  Yep, on Valentine's Day in 2002, at the Epcot Center in Orlando, Florida. It was right before the spectacular fireworks show. We just had dinner at a Moroccan restaurant and were rushing to catch the parade and the show when he suddenly steered us away from the crowd towards a small bridge somewhere. While catching my breath, he got down on a bended knee and presented me with a ring lying inside a small red velvet box. Through the blur of tears, I saw his lips moving and the next thing I know, I said "Yes!" in response to that much-awaited question.. Needless to say, we were both too emotional for words. It took a few minutes before the reality finally sinked in. We got engaged!  We're getting married! Oh, my!

I'd be lying if I tell you that our engagement was a total surprise to me. I've had hints and clues for months but everytime I thought he was going to propose to me (like on Christmas Day, New Year's eve/ day), I was left baffled and undeniably disappointed